Okkkkk…. Sooooo…They say…”music can help heal souls”…and I fully believe that! I’m an advocate for space exploration (PLUTO is a planet, and I believe that’s where the aliens are because it’s made of ice, organisms freeze in ice, and when ice melts …BOOM …water, WATER= LIFE…duhhh), women’s rights, …and the power of music. Part of my stagnant results in my own healing, was that I wasn’t ready to go to that “place of hurt”. The only words I could find to describe it were mine…and they weren’t sounding… “pretty” or “poetic” …at all. I felt like I had reached a point of “ughhhhhh”….I was “MENTALLY CHECKING OUT"!
That’s when I remembered (yes, an AH-HA moment), that I had saved new music from a Cleveland artist, SHALAISHA! I keep a kinda “musical rolodex”, for mental occasions…and SHALAISHA was exactly what I was needing!!! Within the first :08 seconds, when she gives us her infamous gentle runs (*yes runs…she might be the CLEVELAND QUEEN of them)…I knew…my mind and heart was about to be healed! SHALAISHA is a gentle soul. She’s innocently beautiful. The epitome of “good girl”.You won’t get that RA-RA BOUT IT BOUT IT delivery to express her pain, (S/o to Glorilla …she’s my other alter ego, her and ERYKAH BADU) but instead she delivers an assertive, simplistic, honest, genuine, transparent description of the WHO’s, WHAT’s, WHERE’s, WHEN’s, and WHY’s of what happened, who did it, and how it made her feel. Her voice…I try to avoid comparisons, but…think of AALIYAH (rip)… (*I know I know…that’s a huge comparison…but yeah…AALIYAH), soft spoken, heartfelt. It had been a minute since I had really heard new music from SHALAISHA. Soooooooo when I saw her suddenly posting studio session snippets, new music, and motherhood on her socials, I decided to mentally check in, on her “MENTALLY CHECKING OUT”!
Q. What were you thinking when you became pregnant? (I asked this, because it’s always fascinating to see women give birth quietly, without a huge “I’M PREGNANT YALL”, they just suddenly show up pregnant in full motherhood glory)
A.I was thinking…I’m glad, I’m nervous, but this is the journey that has been planned for me, so I accept it, I’m very thankful, having my daughter has really helped me mature in life. I wasn’t expecting to have a baby, but I wouldn’t change a single thing about this moment.
Q.Has your music changed since giving birth?
A.During the pandemic, I was still writing music, I was going through a lot, so I took a break from physically recording my music, but I was still writing music. I hadn’t performed live in a while, but once I finally did…it’s like I started to do it more. I feel like I’ve always written songs about love, my songs and what they are about is pretty consistent. The music I make now is like a lesson about love to my Babygirl.
Q. How have you changed since giving birth?
A.I’ve realized that I was in a cycle, the same cycle, with different people. I’m trying to grow from that, break that cycle.
Q.What is your cycle?
A.I fear being alone, so I find comfort in other people, all of the people are different, so it’s me in the same cycle that’s familiar, and possibly I become comfortable with that cycle…even when it’s been toxic, but it’s the fear of being alone …. that makes me settle…
Q.What type of men will you teach your daughter to watch out for?
A.Someone who genuinely loves you, someone who won’t put you in situations, that will hurt or destroy you, someone who’s gonna build you up , not tear you down, someone to be great with, and someone who’s on your level…. make sure you find someone who’s on your level….
Q.What are you thinking or feeling when you’re singing with your eyes closed?
A. Ha! YES! I do sing with my eyes closed, I guess…I’m really feeling the music, feeling the words that I have written, visualizing the music…I am becoming the song,
Q.Who’s your favorite artist?
A.That’s kinda….whoa just 1…. I really like Jazmine Sullivan, but my favorite singer is KHELANI!!!! OMG I LOVE LOVE LOVE HER WHOLE LIFE! I just came back from her concert! It was sooooooooooo AMAZING!!!She’s my whole life! I’m inspired by concerts. Seeing her…someone my age on stage, she really made it…. seeing people in concert is like …” THEY MADE IT HAPPEN”, so I can too! Songs that are relatable really helped me heal in life.
Q.If you could pass your music to 1 label or anyone who would it be?
A.Honestly …. I’m very nervous about relationships or business with record labels. I’ve heard terrifying stories about contracts, and control…its’ scary out here for independent artists, I’m not trying to have someone capitalize off of me.
(SHALAISHA is a song writer, a real songwriter, so I asked her to describe certain feelings. It’s interesting to hear how a person whose artistic medium is writing…describe something.)
Q.Describe “Happiness”
A. Peace, a peaceful feeling, warmth, nice warm peaceful weather, the color YELLOW, warm sun on my skin.
Q.Describe “Heartbreak”
A.Ohhhh a lot of emotions, disappointment, sadness, hurt, you physically feel like your heart is breaking, deep and dark, low…..
Q.Do you sing to your baby?
A.EVERYDAY! EVERY SINGLE DAY!!!
Q.Have you ever called a dude, and sang 1 of your songs to him to express how you felt?
A.Nooooo!!! Wait…I take that back, I didn’t sing it, but I sent my baby daddy a song I wrote, he said it was “cool”, but I don’t think he actually grasped the idea that it was about him…he seemed unaware….
Q.Who does your hair?
A.Way too many people! I love changing my hair, if anything I’m gonna always have my hair done. It makes me feel good! My cousin she owns a shop, and CRYSTAL does my hair, she’s very dependable.
Q.Besides writing and singing, what do you enjoy doing?
A.Lately I’ve been enjoying reading, I love reading. I’ve been reading “It Ends With Us”, I like self-healing books as well.
*Let’s get into “MENTALLY CHECKING OUT”
Q.How did “MENTALLY CHECKING OUT” happen? (*now at 19,000 views and counting….*headroll fingasnap)
A.I had been writing, I was discouraged a little bit…especially after having a baby, I was dealing with a lot, but I just kept writing…I wasn’t all the way comfortable yet with the song, I do that …I get in my head, I tell myself it’s not good enough. I think it’s good thing and a bad thing…I really want my music to be perfect…I know what it’s supposed to be. Eventually I started going to the studio and working with my producer and the song just kept getting better and better, it was my form of therapy. I guess you can say it helped me heal my heart to a certain point.
Q.Do you journal…like write in a journal?
A.I guess I do! I mean I write my songs down, and looking back that’s a form of journaling, then I hear a melody in my head, so yes…I just keep writing.
Q.Do you think female artists are sometimes overly sexualized to promote music?
A.Depends on the artist. I’ve always been raised to “not do too much”, but there have been times when I’ve really tapped into my own femineity. I think it’s powerful to be able to be confident in your sexuality, but I never want to do to much…where I feel uncomfortable while doing it. I think most women want to be sexy at times and it’s fun to be able to tap into that side. I want to be comfortable.
After mentally checking in with SHALAISHA… (*we discussed more off the record), I felt…like the softer, nicer version of myself, the more feminine version of myself. I had been so used to holding onto emotions, and not being able to express them in a feminine way, that I had become hard and rigid. I was so fearful of actually feeling, heartbreak, pain, love…that I had avoided all love songs, all songs that made me “feel”…I had “MENTALLY CHECKED OUT”. Until… I listened to “METALLY CHECKING OUT”, and listened to every word. I found myself singing with my own eyes closed tightly, feeling every word, and yes…I dropped a *tear (my girls Ariel, and Lex would be shocked …sigh)! I didn’t feel sad anymore, I felt healed…knowing that another woman had felt these same feelings. Especially a woman like SHALAISHA, so quiet and patient… while waiting for her turn in this world. (*Fuck that …we discussed BOSSING UP…HER TIME IS NOW #THISMOMENT) CHECK IN with MENTALLY CHECKING OUT! XOXO